Woot shirts!

Woot recently had their bargain mystery shirt sale again, both for adults and kids.  As always, order 3 for the best price and outcome.  Adult shirts first, kids second...

I LOVE THIS ONE!  It is called Poison.  If you don't get the reference then I'm afraid being friends with you would be inconceivable.  I'd flip you off, but having six fingers makes it difficult to figure out which finger is in the middle.

This next shirt is nice too.  It is called Minor Modifications.  Poor Pluto.  :-(

I wasn't sure what the third shirt was all about.  Now that I know, I"m still pretty Meh about it.  It just doesn't apply to me.  It is called King Of The Grill.  I'm willing to part with this one, if anyone wants it.  It is a ladies XL; you can see the measurements by clicking here.

On to the kids shirts!  This batch produced three that my sons will actually be able to wear in public.

The first is called Cupcakeosaurus.

The second is Fractal Tree.

Third is Orbital Model Of The Carbon Atom.

Pencil Hoarding

I'm in the middle of a household purge and rearrangement.  I came across a small box labeled 'desk' in my husband's writing.

As I started to sort through the mess inside, I found a couple dozen unused pencils that I've been dragging around since high school.  Mostly fancy round pencils; the kind that were sold individually back then.  Holographic, rainbow, marbled pastel, etc.  There were even a couple brightly colored neon pencils with my old Credit Union logo.  I got those when I opened my first checking account at 16.

I remember why I never used them. I couldn't bear to actually sharpen the pencils because they were too pretty.  I wanted them to stay nice and new.  I was also the kid that, given some stickers, would not stick them on anything.  I'd continue to use tiny old crayon stubs rather than 'ruin' a new box of crayons.

I clearly had issues.

I see that same 'saving' trait in my older son.  He will unwrap a gift, but not open the box, because he likes the thing to stay new.  He usually gets around to playing with the toy, but sometimes I will find a small gift - like a matchbox car - still unopened months later.   He is the same way about his favorite candy.  Only recently did he finally eat the last bag of Skittles from the pile that he bought at summer camp in 2010.

My younger will use the heck out of something but will not easily give up the destroyed leavings.  Broken pencils, a random leg from an action figure, a toy car with no wheels, etc.  He is the rare person that actually will find a new purpose for the object.

As an adult, I've made an effort to be more of a Use It or Lose It person.  There is really no point in holding onto things that should be useful but are just collecting dust.  Not even "in case I need it later".  99 times out of 100, you won't.  That other time, you'll swear and gnash your teeth about it.  "If only I hadn't thrown that out two years ago!"   Heh.

I didn't toss the pencils, btw.  I'm going to use them.  For real this time.

Jackpot!

Every so often, Woot has a Random Shirt sale where you can get tees at an extra cheap price.  The catch is, you get to pick the quantity (1-2-3) and the size, but you don't have any say over the design, hence the 'random'.  Sometimes you get one you love, sometimes get one you'd never wear in public, and sometimes you don't care either way.  IMO, it's the best lottery ever.  To get the best deal and the best chance of getting a great design, always buy 3 shirts

If you search my blog you'll see how much I love Shirt.Woot.  I've bought tees for everyone in the family.  I've slacked off on posting earlier summer purchases, so I'll start with those.

Individual purchases, in order: For my husband's birthday, I got "Humanity Gets Voted Off".  For the 11 year old, "Stink Less!"   For the 9 year old, "Cheddar Power".  For me, "Dr. Adorable Love Potion" and "Morning Power Up".

There was also a Kids Shirt Random in July.  This batch was in the 'Meh' category.  "Fresh Crab" is a Woot in-joke, so the kids were perplexed.  "Natural Instinct" is so cute, but a little babyish for their ages. "Two Queens" is a great design...for girls.

And finally this brings us to today's delivery of random shirts for me.  They are all winners, IMO.

First up is "Galactic Gumtastic"  the best part is that there are nine planets.  Pluto may be called a dwarf, but he still belongs.

Second, "If I Only Had a Brain" shows the Wizard of Oz Scarecrow breaking in with a mob of Zombies.  Self-explanatory.  I might just wear this one to Meet The Teacher night tomorrow.

 

The last shirt is for fans of Futurama and retro sci-fi.  "Forbidden Future" shows Bender carrying Leela, ala "Forbidden Planet" 1956 movie poster style.  Both the cartoon and movie are on Netflix, btw.

Great School Supply Tip

If your kid needs solid color folders and you have access to ShopKo*, look for a brand called Better Office Products - Subject By Color.  They make a poly (plastic) folder that will hold up all school year, and often for a second year.

On sale they are $0.99, regular price is $1.79.  They cost more than the cheapie paper folders but you really do get what you pay for in this case.

If you can't find this brand, look for another heavy-duty type.  Wal-Mart sells poly folders, but they are flimsy and prone to tearing.  It should feel sturdy and stand up straight when you hold it by the bottom corner.  If it bends on it's own, don't buy it.

BOP also makes pencil cases that are perfect for holding a 24 pack of colored pencils.  The narrow paper Crayola box gets torn up pretty quickly and the kids don't like to take the time to put the pencils back.  The slide-out drawer makes cleanup fast & easy.

*Walgreens also carries this brand, but selection is limited and they may not have the folders.  I'm sure other stores have them, but I don't know which ones.

Swimsuits found

The inexpensive plain black suit is acceptable.  It's not fantastic and the material feels cheap, but it will do the job for awhile.  The matching swim shorts are nice, despite having a tendency to balloon when I enter the water and make my backside look incredibly huge for a few seconds.  (Thanks for pointing it out, mom!)

© Lands' End

Lands' End is having a really great sale on swimsuits, up to 70% off, so I decided to order one.

I used their size chart, which is nutty because it puts me in 3 different sizes for hips, waist and bust.  I split the difference between hips and bust.  When the suit arrived, it was loose on top and bunchy everywhere else.

I realized I had used my measurements from a few months ago.  I've lost weight since then, but forgot to remeasure.  Duh.

© Lands' End

I did a return/reorder and got the next size down, which arrived today.  The waist is perfect, the bust is a smidgen tight but in a "wow cleavage" way.  The rear is still not quite right.  It seems mostly due to the leg openings being on the small side.  If I tug them down, they make a divot in my leg.  If I pull them up, there is extra fabric in the seat.  I almost miss the high leg holes that were popular the 90s.  Almost.  I'd rather have my ass covered.

I decided to just live with it.  I imagine the leg holes will loosen up once I wear it.  I think it is as good as it gets for a one-piece swimsuit when none of your parts are the same size.

I just want to go swimming already

Click to see full size.

This Cathy cartoon speaks the truth.

I've been having a hell of a time finding a swimsuit, but apparently I've been doing it wrong.  I've been looking for swimsuit sizes to match the the regular clothing size I wear.

A too small suit is not only uncomfortable, but looks terrible once you manage to get it on.  You know what is harder than putting on a too-small swimsuit?  Getting it off.  Talk about a moment of panic...what if I get stuck in it and need to call for help?!  Fortunately, I've only sustained minor injuries and sprains.

Looking at bigger tag sizes is not a problem.  The problem is that the larger the size, the more likely the suit will sport a  neon multi-colored floral pattern or has an idiotic cut like a high neck with a scoop back.  I'm also not fond of beads and metal doodads.

To make it worse, after checking my measurements against online sizing charts such as Lands' End, I've discovered that my hips, waist and bust may not all mutually fit into a one-piece, as each area of my body corresponds with a different size on the chart.  I've tried on separates with better success, but haven't found anything I like enough to buy.

In the extreme opposite end, I followed a blog link to a website called Torrid (meant for teens, I think) that shows models that are not twigs.  I clicked on a swimsuit and checked the size options - 0 to 4  ?!  Looking at the sizing chart, it shows that their 0 is actually a 12 in the real world.  WTFever.  Just because the tag says it does not make it true.

I found a one-piece swimsuit (plain black) and board shorts online, and used a coupon code that reduced the overall price by almost half.  It shipped a couple of days ago and tracking says it is in Illinois.  Wish me luck, but you might hear a really loud ACK!

A month later...

It took forever, but the Kmart box full of tiny teen togs was picked up last Friday and I was refunded today.

Five times.

They processed a separate refund for each item, making five small credits to my account rather than one credit for the total amount.  I'm just glad that I got the full refund that I was due and I don't have to call them again.

Walmart vs Kmart

Our local Walmart Supercenter has been undergoing some changes to layout lately.  So I hear.  I haven't actually been in there in ages, since my husband keeps me locked in the basement.

Anyway, I got a little advertizement flier for the Grand Re-Opening.  There was a $5 gift card inside.  I'll take free money, thank you.  I activated it and put it in my husband's wallet so it will be handy the next time he has to pick up whatever on his way home from work.

Kmart, on the other hand, is PISSING ME OFF.  I posted on May 27 about buying some shirts from kmart.com and how there was a shipping mixup with my order.  The deal was that UPS was to pickup the package, then I'd be refunded.  UPS didn't come, nor did I get an email about it.

So I called one week later.  This time is was a guy I talked to, very apologetic, and he was supposed to make it happen.  It didn't.

I've had this box of wrong clothing sitting here for 23 days, and I'm still out $30.49.  I thought about trying to return these items to a Kmart store, but there are two issues.  First, these incorrect items total over $50.  Second, it says they will credit the original account, which obviously isn't mine.

So as I'm typing, I'm on the phone again with another CS rep, who is also typing up a storm.....

...15 minutes later....

This one tells me she sent a message to the refund department to credit my account, and another to the shipping department to pick the damn thing up.  I'm supposed to get email confirmation from these two departments within 72 hours.  I've heard that before.

Then she asked if I wanted to place an order while I was on the phone.  Grrrr......

Car insurance pays me, twice.

We pay our auto insurance in full every 6 months, March and September.  A few weeks ago, we got a letter from saying that our policy premium was calculated incorrectly, and that we had overpaid.

I figured that it would be a credit on our account and it would be applied to September's bill.  A week later, we got a check for $3.13.

A day or two after that, they sent a policy statement showing the refund and a $0.00 balance.

Today another letter came, saying there was another error and we were still overpaid.  Attached was a check for 12¢.  I can't wait to roll up to the bank and say, "I'll take this in pennies please."

I have a feeling that another statement is on the way.

I'm happy that our insurance company is trying to stay on top of things by fixing discrepancies, but this is waste of paper and postage!

Top Hat Ducky

One of my kids worked on a story project with some classmates.  This is the result.  I did not correct the spelling or typos.

Top Hat Duckey

 

It Started
There was a duck, his name was Top Hat Ducky.  He stunk so bad you had to plug your nose when you walked by.  He had five open heart surgeries.  He is unhealthy and belches when he eats bugs, worms, somemores and sugar.  He camps and fishes a lot.  One day he went camping in the forbidden woods.  He burped so loud the trees tipped over.  It smelt like moth balls.  He heard a rustle in the bushes.  He took out his ninja suit and swiftly put it on.  A bear jumped out of the bushes!  Top Hat Ducky slashed him with a one sword swing.  The bear was dead.

When Death Arrives
Top Hat Ducky thought he was safe, but then, he was attacked by a dinosaur skeleton!  top Hat Ducky thought he was doomed!  Then, the Incredibles (the movie), with five tanks and ten bazookas shot the dinosaur skeleton, saving Top Hat Ducky.  Soon wild porcupines began to ambush them.  The Incredibles shot the porcupines to pieces and took the bones to the science fair.  Tired and exhausted from fear, Top Hat Ducky lit a bug and said, "It's all done" and drank some hot coffee.  Dukey found a tree by a village and slept.

Death and Deaths Pet
The next days...Top Hat Ducky woke up and he saw that he was in jail with a dragon!  He said to the dragon "how will we get out of here".  The dragon said, I thought you would ask.'  The dragon took a deep breath sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
He melted the jail bars!  They ran away.  Now Ducky had a pet.  They hid in a castle but there were too many traps set through out so they left.  Ducky and the dragon left to the camp site to start a warm camp fire.

The Ending
Top Hat Ducky woke up from a horrible nightmare!  "It was just an evil dream", he said to himself.  The pulled the camper home where he reunited with his wife Hortanse and two twin boys Hubert and Huggly.

The End

The empress' new clothes

At the moment, I'm topless.

No, not literally.  I'm wearing a raggedy old SpongeBob shirt.  But I don't have the new shirts I ordered.

I'm not big on clothes shopping so once I find something I like I tend to get multiples to save me from having to do it again any time soon.

A couple of weeks ago, I was waiting for a prescription to be filled at Kmart and found some v-neck t-shirts.  They are great because they fit well without being too tight or baggy.  The sleeves are not cap sleeves, but not overly long.  The length is just right.  In the store, they only had a couple colors in my size so several days later I went to Kmart.com to check out the selection.

I ended up buying 4 more t-shirts, plus a tank top in the same brand/style family.  When I went to checkout, I was pleasantly surprised by a notice stating that I would get free shipping for buying 5 items.

The package was delivered by UPS yesterday.  A huge box, but lightweight.  There were more air-pillows than clothes inside.  Unfortunately, the stuff inside was not mine.  It was all extra-small junior sized clothing.  Teeny, tiny white capris.  An itty bitty bedazzled tank top with dental floss for straps.   You get the picture.  The packing slip said they were meant for a woman in Arkansas.  Poor, malnourished little girl.  ;-)

I suspect the shipping labels were simply mixed up and that right about now she is looking my clothing and thinking, "Those gals in Wisconsin eat too much cheese."

I proceeded to spend 25 minutes on the phone with customer service.  The CS rep was nice, but I think she was new.  UPS is supposed to pick up the package, at which time I will be refunded.  I haven't received the notice form UPS yet.

In order to get the clothes I was meant to have, I had to repeat the order and pay a second time.  They've already shipped my order, so it should be here on Monday.

NKOTBSB

Okay, so my core musical tastes haven't really evolved much since high school.  I do like many different kinds of music, but there are just certain things that take you for a happy ride in the WayBack Machine.

You know I had to pre-order the New Kids On The Block / Backstreet Boys combo album.  I'm going to play this in the car the next time we take a trip out of town, to see if Mark's ears bleed.

It was released (and delivered) today.  I also just saw that Matthew Morrison of GLEE fame is joining them on tour.  That sent me into fits of immature giggles.

The CD comes with a poster of the cover art, minus the lettering.  The back has the 2011 Tour schedule.  It doesn't look like they are coming anywhere near me.  There is also a booklet with some words from each member.  The disc is scratched, which is annoying as hell.  It makes me want to show up at the packing warehouse and issue a QA smackdown.  It plays though, so the beating is averted.

Friends don't let friends make Bad Choices

I propose a 24 hour waiting period on the sale of permanent hair dye, and it should require the signature of a reliable friend who will not allow you to choose a stupid color.

I'm not generally one to color my hair, but for some reason it seemed like a great idea yesterday.  Yeah.  Great like sticking a fork in an outlet.

I decided that I wanted to add red to my brown hair so I chose Revlon ColorSilk 49 - Auburn Brown.   Since my hair is dark brown, I thought the red would be a bit more subtle than shown on the box, since the samples on the back were for blonde and light brown hair.  This dye is not supposed to lighten hair, it adds darker pigments.

What happened to my head did not resemble the picture on the box.  There were solid streaks of red and chunks of dark brown.  It did not have the look of intentional multi-color hair.  It looked like I mixed Kool-Aid and shoe polish in a toilet, shoved my head in, and flushed.

This morning, I had to make the walk of shame back to Walgreens and I picked up a box of Color Oops:

It says that it removes hair dye by shrinking the pigments so that you can wash it out.  It is not a bleach.  You put the solution on your head for 20 minutes, then spend another 20-30 minutes of shampooing and rinsing.  They stress that rinsing for a long, long time is essential.  I used up all of the hot water by the time I was done.

The good news is, my hair is no longer full of bright red and dark brown stripes.  Everything seems to be evened out.  It also doesn't seem to be damaged by the process.  A little dry from all the washing, but nothing some good conditioner can't handle.

The not-quite-so-good news is that despite the fact that neither product was meant to lighten hair, I somehow have lighter hair.  It reminds me of when I was a kid and would spend hours at the pool.  The sun would lighten my hair and give it a reddish cast.   I can live with this.  If it looks funny as it starts to grow, I'll have it dyed darker at a proper salon.

BEFORE

AFTER

UPDATE!  My hair darkened overnight.  This morning, it was almost exactly the same as before this whole mess began.  It has just a hint of red in it, which is what I wanted all along. I don't know why or how it happened, but I'm happy about it.

The day AFTER after!

After School Special - puberty edition

Our conversation on the walk home from school:

Eric, looking traumatized:  Mom!  We learned about girl-puberty today.  All the boys and girls sat in the same room and watched a video.  *uncomfortable silence*
Me:  And how was it?
Eric:  It was SO disgusting.  There were diagrams of girl privates and they talked about...gross stuff....
Me:  Like periods?
Eric:  UGH!!! Yes. Why?!  I don't need to know about that.
Ethan:  What is a period?
Eric:  NO!  No don't tell him!  You don't want to know?!?!
Ethan:  Yes I do.  What is it?
Me:  Well you know how girls have eggs inside?
Ethan:  *giggles* They DO?!
Me:  *sigh*  Yes, you know that.  Remember?
Ethan:  Oh, yeah...
Me:  So every month when an egg isn't going to be a baby, it gets flushed out along with blood.
Ethan:  Girls poop out eggs?
Me:  Noooo....you know how girls and boys have different parts?  Girls have parts for that sort of thing.
Ethan:  Oh, okay....Hey, look at this cool rock I found.
Eric:  I can't believe they did that to us.
Me:  Did they show boy diagrams?
Eric:  No.  *heavy sigh*  They are making us do that tomorrow.  With girls in the room.
Me:  So what did you think about the information?
Eric:  Nasty barfaroni and cheese!!!!!  I don't need to know all this stuff about crotches!
<pause>
Eric:  I heard "barfaroni and cheese" on Phineas and Ferb.  Hey Ethan, want to play Pirates of the Caribbean Life?  After we have a snack.

And we're back to our regularly scheduled trauma-free program.